Friday, February 11, 2011


Ok! Now that Avery is a full year old, I am really trying to figure out the *gulp* discipline* word.

When we had a child, discipline is probably the very last thing on the "what I should probably figure out" list. And now, I feel like the deadline is here and I still don't have it figured out.

A few weeks ago, I went to pick up Avery at our friend Rebecca's house. She then explained to me that a little boy had bit Avery. Honestly, I really wasn't phased by this. Yes, he got a little 'owie', but he's with other little kids and things like that will happen when he's with other kids. I probably could easily overreact (yes, Im a first time mom) and freak out, but I know that I can't put him in a plastic bubble.

But anyway- A few days later, Avery was upset at me because of the fact that he had picked up my cell phone and I had taken it from him " no Avery, that's not a toy", I said.

He then looked at me, wrinkled up his little forehead and and he began to scream, and throw his little body down on the floor. It was his first "fit". So I picked him up, set him on my lap and made eye contact "No.. that's not okay, Avery." I said with as stern as a voice as I could muster.I set him back down and tried to hand him a toy. He, again, thew his little body down on the floor .. and then he leaned in and.. bit me... yep. The little one year old bit...

and at that moment a couple things happened: A) I was taken back to the week prior when I was told by Rebbecca that another little boy had did that to him. Of course he had picked this up from other little ones, but that still doesn't justify his actions. And B) I realized that the "the disciple deadline" was here, and I needed to figure out what was right for us- like now.

So- At that point, instinctively, I gave his little hand a pat/smack. Enough for him to connect the two actions so maybe his little one year old mind will put the dots together and he would be like "OK, that's not OK for me to do"....And then I put him in the pack and play in our room for a few minutes. Yes, he wasn't a happy camper, but after a few minutes I went back in there and scooped him him and embraced him. It bothered ME more than I think the whole scenario bothered him. And then the realization hit me that I need to sit down with Justin and figure what our choice in disciplining Avery is going to be.


Don't we all just wish that we didn't have to disciple our children? HAHA. I mean, that they just came out perfect and kind?

But that is not the reality. And I am just starting to realize it. I have met wonderful parents on both sides of the spectrum when it comes to disciple (to spank/ to not spank). I think it's a very individual/ personal decision that we cannot force upon others.

I remember reading in Shaun Groves blog once when referring to God as a perfect parent" think of God birthing his children, naming his boy and girl, walking in the Garden with them. I imagine him planting those delicious trees, providing food enough. I see him talking with Adam and Eve face-to-face, spending quantity and quality time with his kids every day. I hear him protecting them, setting those all-important boundaries: you can do all this but definitely don’t do that over there.

And they still didn’t believe he had their best interests in mind.

They still didn’t trust him.

They didn’t eat right.

They still disobeyed

And they’re own kids wound up in a fight to the death.

Even perfect parents aren’t guaranteed an all-happy ending without regret, distrust, pain, and dysfunction."

There's no perfect parents or child out there, and I take comfort in that. I know that God knows my heart, and my love for Avery. God knows that I want to instill values and raise him to be a wonderful, respectful, loving man. I want him to know right from wrong, and to value discipline. Discipline is a key part of parenting and I am relying on God as I begin this journey!


Thursday, February 10, 2011

Birthday Boy Avery

It's 4:15 here and I'm taking a few minutes out of my day. Not because I have a few minutes to spare, but because I need to stop and take a breather. Even if it's just a few minutes, and I want to update of Avery's first official birthday!!!
Yesterday was Avery's offical one year birthday. He's going to have a small party with my mom and dad and justins parents too on Saturday, but as a way of celebrating it with him Justin and I both took a vacation day to spend with him. It was nice. And I really hope it to be something that we can continue to do yearly.

We started off the day in Cinci at the Dr.'s office. It wasn't realluy planned, but it just had to happen. I was a little nervous because this is a whole new physician, and Avery's been sick, and I just didn't know how I would feel. So Avery got examined and she immediately noticed his breathing difficulties. We talked about some of his recent problems and the she then prescribed some new meds. I'm hoping that this will be a better turn of events.

After the Dr. visit we stopped at Perkins and ordered a huge breakfast for the 3 of us. Avery even got to try his first eggs since he is now 1 year old! He loved them!! He hate a whole plate by himself.

We then ventured to Best Buy where Justin and I picked up a FlipCamera. We don't have anything for video other than a small feature on our digital camera so we thought that we would go ahead and get something to capture Avery's first b-day party.

We then made a round to the Newport Aquarium. Avery was actually scared of the fish, which was surprising to us. He eventually warmed up to the idea and would allow us to put him close to the tanks. It was alot of fun. We have a video- I will try to post it here later..

And finally we went home. Avery and I took a long nap, and when we woke up, Justin had made a trip out to get us fruit smoothies. We let avery drink a banana smoothie. And then we gave avery one of our birthday presents that we got him- I little red tent. When he saw us bring it out with a big red bow on it, he died laughing. He was so excited! So we spent the rest of the night playing hide and go seek with the tent until his little legs couldnt move he was so tired.

It was such a sweet, special day. We thought about spending the "family day" money to have a huge party with lots of friends and family, but opted to have just the three of us have an outing and I am so glad we did. It is probably going to be one of thoes memories I will tell Avery about when he's 30..

I think we may just stick with this idea, at least until he's old enough to say "ok. enough of you guys.. I want a huge party".. haha


Friday, February 04, 2011

Oh, the life of a workin momma!

News news news! Avery took his first stepS today. I am capitalizing the 'S' on steps because for the past month he has took a step here and there  but always ended up plopping on his bottom after the first step. Well, today Justin's momma calls me and informs me that Avery took his first STEPS . It's one of thoes things that you celebrate, but at the same time, it's truely a bitter sweet moment for me for selfish reasons.  I had always imagined seeing it happen and grabbing the camera and getting the photo of such a milestone. I have photos of his first bath, first smile, his first time he ate solid foods, the first time he sat up..etc., etc.  So I was HOPING that he would wait to walk for his momma (after work, of course!) 
 Being a working mother is the hardest job on the earth, hands down.I had no idea how straining emotionally it would be to be away from your child.  I love working and providing for my family, especially since we are on the road to a debt free life. And I want be able to provide things for Avery that others might not be able to, like college for example. (Which BTW, we started Avery's college fund for his 1 year birthday).  But then there are moments like these that hit you and you realize that even if you are working hard to get there, time doesn't wait, life still happens, My baby starts walking! ahh. If only life were easier and we all could just hit the lottery and be home with our babies. lol. paradise!
 I love my little man so much.  


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